plz talk dirty to me
I just pulled a feather out of my vagina.
I am not joking.
what made you think it was a good idea to trust the girl that hides tequila in her backpack?
Everything about him screamed your future.
guess what. just found out I had mono. no wonder alcohol didn't taste good on nye
I just went to a chocolate syrup wrestling party I think you need to get on my level
That's like lying to my vagina. I can't betray it like that.
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
hooked up with the gay kid & his friend's mom told me "you know he has a identical twin brother whose straight, right?"
Bathroom attendant appreciated that hug I have him as a tip. Fucking BROKE these days.
Like, what's the customary waiting period to hookup with your newly single ex that you never stopped hooking up with?
Oh, honey. If you're seeing a girl just for the sex, never doubt that she knows and she's doing the same thing. We're not stupid, we're just craftier than you.
I decided to start over my porn collection by deleting the old stuff. That was a sad piece of a pie chart...
Who knew a blowjob could cause this kind of crazy
He wasn't prepared for it
The last thing I remember was them slipping shots into my beer bong, and me being happy about it
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