I hate you but I'm not in hate with you
my vag is singing 'hurts so good' by john mellencamp
Things to remember: Girls don't appreciate it when you yell "Beast Mode!" when switching to doggy style.
Im not sure if he just tripped or was star gazing, but i gave him head anyway.
I told him I was prego. He asked coul we do it without a condom now since I cldn't get any pregnanter. What an a-hole.
its not facebook stalking, its market reasearch
Your clothes are in washers 2,3 and 4. I arranged by darks, whites, then frat... I'm not even joking
If we were to wake in ur bed together, what are the 3 words you would say to me?
Get out now.
i just saw that homeless guy who dresses like the cat in the hat at the liquor store. i guess he got enough change to have a good weekend. oh the places he'll go
Your lack of a response has proven you've clearly forgotten how crazy I am.
Drinking vodka in the bathtub.... If I don't make it, I thank you for your magical parts
Your boyfriend and I are bonding over your giant dick.
last thing I remember is yelling 'sit on my face' through a traffic cone
I literally cut myself out of my pants. What is my life.
For the love of all that is holy just take the tranquilizers Erica
Randomize
