yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
just used a blowie as payment for him having to take the dog out to let her poop.
please tell me that the half empty jar of cocktail sauce on the table has nothing to do with my missing seamonkeys
I don't have any swimsuits that don't show off the weird handprint bruises on my hips. Do you have a onepiece I can borrow?
I have a scary feeling my mom might switch her goals from finding me a husband in 2012 to sending me to rehab
Can I send you a picture of my penis? I feel like it looks really good right now and I need someone to share it with
jut tell him gently that you'd rather spend more time with his dick than his face
You took a selfie with my hard dick and sent it to Scott with the caption 'Toldja'. It was hard to forget you're a teenager after that
Shaving your balls drunk sounds like a good idea untill you do it
Alas my dad DD'd me. Legit cock blocked to the highest degree
I hope dressing like a sexy, but very grown up and intelligent, secretary while out shopping helps disguise how high I am right now.
If I'm going to keep blacking out this much I need to start taking more pictures.
Day one of being single and I've came three times. I can get used to this.
I just walked in on my dad beating it.. There's not a fucking therapist in ARKANSAS that can help me with that!
When he identified himself as captain clitoris i knew my night was fucked.
Randomize
