i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
I love taking my adderall while im in class! As soon as I take the pill out everyone around me just stares in envy!
There's a show on the Discovery Channel about T-Rex sex. I think this just made my life.
I wasnt that drunk. Throwing the table off the third story was totally logical.
This needs to stop. I just vacuumed the wall. Adderall is a double edged sword.
Just threw the poptarts. Sgits boutta go Down. 1 liter of wine
I think I'm getting too used to throwing up in the reception trash can. It doesn't even phase me anymore
You would be too ashamed to ever love me again if you saw the filth I just created. It brings unspeakable dishonor to the nacho dynasty. Like I raped the king's daughter, cut off her hands and made him eat them that's how hard I fucked up nachos.
Check the mailbox while you're out!
I already looked this morning. You go check and see what you won on Ebay after your day drinking spree.
So I don't know, I'm not a doctor, but I might be juggling dates with 3 different guys...
Every time I burp I plan an escape route because I'm scared I'm gonna puke on grandma
Good, I would never sleep with your boyfriend , or send you an edible arangment
He took my necklace off while we were 69ing. His tongue never stopped moving either. Take that, guys who can't figure out how bras work.
Moral of the story - don't craft naked. Your nipples with thank me.
Come on baby if you haven't had a Charleston chew eatin out of your ass you just ain't livin right.
Randomize
