She looked kinda like Mario Batali?
So A**** bought my story about how my hickey was a bruise from wrestling
on one hand i'm glad that i'm not in trouble...on the other hand i realized that the reason i cheat on her is because she is so stupid
friends don't let friends hook up with gingers.
I have a question, if it paid really well, like ridiculously well, would you be a restaraunts under the table resident blowjob girl?
this guy had a colored tattoo of Chucky on his leg, whatever drugs he does, i want them
I'm still not sure if it was intentional, but the chiropractor definitely cradled his balls on my shoulder. He even seemed to adjust the sack for comfort. I think I should be flattered. He is a doctor, after all..
Confession: Sometimes I wear my stolen scrubs to the corner store because people will think I'm a doctor and not just a girl too lazy to change out of her pajamas.
I think I'm in love. He's everything I ever wanted for myself, just with a lot more drugs.
I have to deal with three things I do not like this weekend. Pooping in toilets that are not mine. Air mattresses. Not beating off in the shower.
note to self: shower sex when you have 7 stitches in your leg is never a good idea. never.
Just successfully invited my mom to a drag show. If that doesnt say "im gay" then idk what will.
If it was any colder outside, the frost from my breath would make a mixed drink
Pretty sure at some point last night i said to myself "it'll be fun to completely lose my mind for a night"
I was grinding on my boss last night. So Monday will be fun. That's what's going on in my life right now.
i was sitting on the kitchen floor shaking my gallon of vodka at people and asking if they wanted to climb the heaven hill... getting dumped is the best thing that has ever happend to me
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