You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
I feel like a panda just shit rainbows on my mind
Does my surprise involve the use of a safe word?
Probably.
I'm in.
I can mark tailgating, going to the game and getting road head off my to do list today
He offered me a ride home but i walked. He lives by an elementary school so a 10 yr old safety officer helped me across the street during my walk of shame
The other. Cat spoke to me and left. This shit is laced
The first cat might save me but they are taking out masks
Boobs speak an international language.
the mexican frat downstairs started singing this mariachi song, then out of nowhere some dude busts out a trumpet and plays along. is this even real?
There is a 97.5% chance that my sketchy roommate is also a hooker.
So when can I meet her?
I need an inhaler full of pot for all of this breathless rage.
Now we're discussing the sex we had and the later lack thereof. It's like marriage counseling via snapchat.
The only times we have to apologize in this friendship is when you intentionally punch me and that's only happened once so it's okay
My next goal in this relationship is to teach my boyfriend that there are valid reasons to be fear of dolphins completely.
He literally stole all the change that was on my floor and ran away while I was peeing. I have to rethink my standards.
decided to jump from one of the levels of the Westin chicago Nortghwest. it was worth the broken legs.
Randomize