No idea how I passed that sobriety test.
i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
I feel like I got hit by a truck made out of Jack Daniels.
I woke up on the steps beside a plate of spaghetti and a toilet paper roll ripped in half. And i actually think this day is gonna get better.
Just heard her singing at the school concert... I am honored my penis was touched by those pipes
I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
I just watched a video of Justin Bieber kissing a girl..... the sad thing is that I actually got upset.
all i asked was if it was all the way in, and now im laying here alone. sensitive guys fucking suck
I woke up to the sound of a beer can being opened. I love him already
sudden memory flashback: you and i having sex on the bed, erin sitting naked in your desk chair drinking whiskey straight from the bottle while harassing you for your computer password to play some "mood music." high five. go us.
...But it's not like we would be the first people to pay for an abortion with student loans and cell phone rebates.
Besides asking our teacher if he enjoyed being fisted did I have any other tragic moments last night?
Nobody has seen her in 3 days. Should we call the cops or hope this is just another drunk Carmen San Diego game she's playing?
I say "glasses of whiskey" like I didn't chug it out of the bottle
Heels with jeans turned Casual Friday into Casual Sex With My Boss Friday
Randomize
