I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
just came on the shower curtain. sorry housekeeping.
I wish you had a penis so you could experience peeing out the window in front of a crowd of people leaving parties.
Just topless shotgunned a bud light alone. I am about to peer mentor the shit out of these freshmen.
Just erased 'masturbate' from my mental To-Do list because I've got too much stuff to do. I hate adulthood
We both bought three foot bongs...going to race to see who can smoke a mile first.
I guess it was to be expected that I was put on somebody's list called penis socket.
I'm lonelier than Tom Hanks in Cast Away, right meow. Ready to make this bong my Wilson.
You are softly singing to the wall while slow dancing with it. I feel as though you should discontinue this behavior.
She looked at my cock with a kind of resigned disappointment.
Im about to get a baby alligator stoned, what are you doing with your life?
So you're on like a list there now..."Do not under any circumstances give this person a knife. Serve them in plastic cups ONLY"
She said I'm going to get you stoned and have you fuck me on the couch.
I don't just want drugs. I deserve drugs.
Something in me snapped and now I’m just googling famous vegans.
Randomize
