she was so not down for the gang bang
Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
how do you tell a roommate that having sex on your bottom bunk is not appropriate even if she has a top bunk that's hard to climb to?
I really need to stop carrying a flask around with me in my backpack at school..
Aren't you in 8th grade?
9th, but that's not the point.
he aimed his bare ass at the sparkler, farted, and it really did work...i love 4th of july anal fire works
I feel if a girl leaves my house the next morning feeling degraded and in desparate need of a shower, then I have succeeded.
At the same time. Hot men feeding me brownies. In between rounds of sex.
I vagually remember taking your birthcontrol and washing it down with ash water
He corrected my use of grammar... I think we both know that means i have to sleep with him
What's sexier than showing up smelling like fast food cigarettes with a jar of moonshine in your hand
I told you being able to play expert on guitar hero would get us laid one day
So if he doesn't show up do we eat his birthday cake? Because I'm stoned and wrestling is on. What's the proper protocol
A bitchslap is in order.
He’s actually a personal trainer. He said he hasn’t taught yoga in a while but the stripper prefers to introduce him as a yoga teacher
I'm wearing jeans from 7th grade and drinking a fucking macchiato. This better be a good day.
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