Passed out watching pirates of caribbean with vodka in hand. Woke up to jenna jameson, with vodka gone.
so i woke up thsi morning with a phadora on my head, no shirt and a huge hangover? want to help me figure this out?
I told him I'm not paying rent anymore because he's seen my boobs.
Its piss that you smell... I borrowed that shirt last week. Sooo, wanna grab some laundry soap on your way home? And good luck on your date.
I just got while a charlie horse while orgasming...most confusing feeling ever...
im proctoring the SATs right now and im still drunk from last night. i really wanna tell these kids that this fucking test doest mean shit and they will just be constantly drunk once in college.
I woke up next to her will a oven mit taped to my cock. Dear god, I might have tried to use it as a condom.
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
do you know how hard it is to walk a mile drunk on 151 it's hard yards are soft and every girl looks good
So I'm at the VFW tonight and the shot special here is straight 151 for 2 dollars. They must hate our livers
its amazing there are so many photos of me and him separately, since most of that party time was spent sneaking away to fuck upstairs...
This is embarrassing but i think i might have left my fake tooth at your house on your night stand.
You were a for sure 10. You put on a traffic cone to meet someone.
If I stopped drinking I'd have to take up murdering.
I'm sorry, I'm tired, I can't play long distance cockblock anymore. Good night don't get too pregnant.
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