Yeah, i don't remember peeing. or meeting the girl.
question: does your pee smell like mojitos at all?
Fastest blow job ever. Though it was probably a good thing since we were in front of my house.
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
My only regret is that we didn't pee on our neighbors Prius
Why is everyone else growing up when I'm just crying, eating, and having pregnancy scares?
He motorboated me, gave me a business card that said congratulations on my motorboat, then disappeared into the night.
Find him and marry him.
you told the police officer you wanted to be just like her one day but not a lesbian
And that facial hair. He might as well shave it so it spells "douche" on one cheek and "nozzle" on the other.
Twice. I only peed my pants twice tonight.
You throw up behind 1 mannequin and it's world war 3 in forever 21
you need a warning label. Just announcing that you are Scottish is seen more as a challenge. Those guys have no idea what they are getting into.
I don't know how much expertise I could offer. My best advice is, "don't drown, for god's sake don't drown"
That's just how I roll. I drink, then tell people I'm either not wearing underwear or I'm training to be a stripper.
1. I drank goldschlager 2. I fell in a bathtub and hit my head (hard) on a soap dish. 2. I sat in said bathtub talking to a random stranger on vacation from wyoming (who i met at a 711 looking for taquitos) for almost an hour. 3. We got kicked out of said bathtub by owner of bathtub. 4. We had sex.
Randomize
