Just tipped at a bar in cheerios. Suck it.
the last thing i remember is inserting the sippy stray into the jack daniel's.
Its a bummer that corporate america doesn't believe in $2 u call its on a Sunday night
My hanfda are one with the u niverse and I am cirretnly inhaling a couch
it's 2:30 on a sunday and I just won a wine chugging contest. I'm never graduating.
So update from last night: I made friends with a coke dealer, I tore the card scanner off the wall of my dorm, and I passed out on our bathroom counter with my head in the sink.
Yeah, I've been trying to get him to eat healthier. Turns out he'll eat almost any fruit or vegetable as long I let him eat it off my body.
This is where you say "Why yes we will drink with reckless abandon and hopefully not be in a church parking lot again."
Finding that toy duck there was weird right?
He's not messing around tonight. 4 fist pumps.
woke up to find i out made out with his roommate before hooking up with him. breakfast was awkward to say the least
We have a shopping cart in our front lawn. Also Mickey D's breakfast?
So far my survey results are telling me to pawn the ring. Thoughts?
Every time I try to do something productive I end up searching ghost porn.
Only in the emergency room do they shut the door when youre laughing too hard
I broke my dick don't ask me how I need help putting in a catheter so I can piss.
Randomize
