Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
Today a TA in one of my classes told me he thought I was 35 and going back to school as an adult learner. Alcohol is working me.
i was out of cigarettes so i took the butts out of the ashtray, emptied them out, and proceeded to roll one big Frankenstein cigarette.
She said I had the biggest dick she'd ever seen. And when you consider how many she's come in contact with, it's kind of like winning the heisman.
Beer lympzucs are ki7lling me
Responsibility: Hiding your beer when your DWI clients who are out on bond come to talk to you at bars.
It's gay pride weekend and Father's day.. So in honor of the occassions I am now BI
Remember when we saw my neighbor taking dick pics of himself? He's back at it!
The plan was to get laid... Now the plan is to survive.
Do you think wearing a shirt that says I like penis is too much for tonight?
Not as awesome as someone telling you that you have the biggest tits they've ever seen. And they're like 30-something, so they've seen a decent amount of tits in their lifetime.
Thank fucking Christ I was not wearing pants or eating chocolate cake last night.
No, I found out he was gay when I walked in on him blowing the guy from the dorm room next to ours.
Just filed for child support I hope he gets the paperwork on Father's Day
Remember the Giant sandworm from the movie Dune? Well that's about how big his dick is. No bulshit.
Randomize
