i threw up in his kitchen sink and then used a measuring cup to drink water because i couldn't find a clean glass. i just threw up down the stairs. it's gonna be a long walk home.
ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
Girls don't like it when you cum inside them and then discuss baby names.
He called me "the Joe Montana of blowies." Not sure if that is an accomplishment or an insult, but going off of the amount of condensation on the windows of my car, I'm gonna just do a little touchdown dance and pass out.
Only you could be admitted to the ER and walk out with a nurse's phone number. I wish I was gay
And dont forget my 23rd birthday where with no underwear i crawled through the cage of the police car. Dont get drunk be fore you get drunk.
Does hooking up with the gay pledge count as hazing?
Please come quick there are people in suits here judging me
You had a hat of bras. Probably a good dozen, which is totally impressive for a Thirsty Thursday
When we pulled over so you could pee, you made us stand over you and "make a roof"
Why is it I can't go buy redbull and tylenol pm from a store without getting questions about my health choices?
How did I end up in some random dudes car?
Some guy came up to you and asked if you knew how to drive stick.
I didn’t want to see that boob. I told her not to show me but she said “no, I’m going to show you”
i’n just gonna forge ahead, gag reflex be DAMNED.
Not only is he funny, he had a REALLY big dick
He's old enough to be your father!
REALLY. BIG. DICK.
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