stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
This is the worst date ever. Pls kill me. No, wait, scratch that, stick to the original plan of killing Paris Hilton, I'll live though this
I hate to tell you this, but your sister reeks of whore.
you yelled then hung up at the girl on information bc she could not pinpoint your location and tell you how to get to dennys
It's gotten to the point where NOT peeing in the sink feels strange and uncomfortable.
I thought he was kidding when he said pretend to be a dunkin donut delivery women. This is the last time I ever role play.
Dubbing lion king over planet earth. That stoned.
I really wanna know when trying to grow up turned into try not to throw up.
Just high watching the holiday fireplace channel. My space heater lends authenticity to the fire experience. Come over.
She called him at 5 AM so that he'd be ready for her birthday breakfast and drinks at 6. This is why people don't need to wait until their 21st to have their first drink.
I met this girl the other day and found out her boyfriend is a helicopter pilot. How the fuck do you compete with that.
if i actually get asked out by my dealer what could happen?
i don't know, but it probably involves bathtubs full of weed
He sent me a pic of her engagement ring and then STILL asked for nudes.
Thats not real though. Slash there are other extenuating circumstances to lead me to believe dick is wanted
HOLY FUCK I SPELLED EXTENUATING RIGHT ON THE FIRST TRY. IM THE BEST DRUNK NA
only i would get cock blocked by a cop
Randomize
