drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.
That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
"I could never have "feelings" for someone who, at one point, wanted to "hate fuck" my face."
I took a bird feeder and filled it with alka-seltzer. Can you say fireworks?
I think it was the chocolate body paint and awesome blowjob that finally made us official.
Don't worry, nothing happened....but we should have a fire extinguisher here.
Please don't tell me I was shouting "I'm bleeding from my vagina" in front of my ex-boyfriend and his new girlfriend.
i've learned that i'm good at stealing things. like live cats.
I honestly didn't see the problem playing beer pong In the car on the road trip home.
this dude just showed up to the party with a falcon
I woke up covered in thousand island dressing. I need answers.
I fear our relationship is coming to an end. Last night I felt the need to bloody apologise for waking him up with a blow job.
Her name was Danica but I felt like it would be hard to say drunk so I called her Shelby
Such a shame we didn't work out. We would've been a power couple producing NFL linemen :/
We keep making plans but he keeps getting arrested. Such a tease
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