I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
Spotted: jayne dropping her cigarettes in a puddle...then picking them back up and putting them in her pocket. If i ever get that desperate, stop talking to me
It's just like soggy cereal, but cancerous
I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
is this the only place in the world where you can get shot on one side of town, and have to stop for cows crossing the street on the other side?
dude, there's a fucking musical in my head. it's fucking awesome being this high.
all i remeber is falling off a fence and banging him in the middle of the street, not sure which one gave me this cut
Sharon took in a random bleeding stranger drunker than her, named her Nicole, and is feeding her jello shots on the toilet
I can trace it back to that drunken night where we peed on each other in the shower.
Im pretty sure he just said he wants to make a baby with me, but he's pretty shitfaced, so I'm not sure if he knows who I am.
I was crying hysterically and you wouldn't stop petting my ear and shushing me every time I tried to say something.
Remember me drinking the vodka from in between your legs?
This lumberjack with a huge beard is doing his group presentation in a dirty t shirt that says "I'm only 2 girls short of a threesome"
It's times like this I miss having my nipples pinched
I can't believe this. 100 bucks says my Botox lasts longer than their marriage will.
I'll pass on that plan. The lack of my penis in new vaginas is no where on the itinerary.
Randomize
