this weekend will be like the season finale to my life
I introduced him to the male G-Spot. Don't ever tell me I'm not experienced.
We just set the fire alarm off with a fog machine. What's my first instinct? Finish my drink. I think I handled that correctly.
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
She screamed at us, "You guys need to wake up and smell the beer-bong!"
If I was home I'd be ouija boarding the fuck out of the house, haven't been this high since that day
I Have a huge scrape on my knee and I need a better excuse than dry humping on a park bench...
Hahaha idk what's worse your life or my hangover.
It's really hard to masturbate now that I live with girls who actually function before 11 am.
I think I just got buffalo sauce on my penis. Is that a turn on or off?
If you're gonna show up unannounced on hangover day, you better have coffee doughnuts and a boner
Greattt I just sexted my dad trying to write u back
My party ended early and I have a mountain of shrimp and weed
I’m ready to be reckless and make stupid decisions, and I need you to support me in that.
No dude 10 parakeets in your bedroom is 9 parakeets too many. Bring them back. Today!
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