You act like I'm friends with her or something. I only screw her boyfriend!
Oh yeah.
then they high fived as they party boyed me. I was a policewoman sandwhich. I love you halloween.
I wasn't trying to make you feel bad, I just agreed with you that your life does suck.
his dick is like his red hair, amazing but useless
No stds, not pregs, and lost two pounds. I'd call that a successful two years of grad school.
So last week was the 4th time a girl cried after sex. I'm seriously doing something wrong
Come find me please? Im in a ditch.
That doesn't help me much...
I'm right under the moon!
I told him I'd put in a good word. And the word of the day is: NEGATIVE
Ya he's the booze devil, like if the black hole and Bermuda triangle joined forces with Captain Morgan
I'm glad the semester is over. I need a break from the term "whiskey sharts" coming up so much in conversation.
You drunk? Cause I have a terrible idea...
Googling enemas while I get a pedicure ... My life in one senence
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
Hey how're your balls?
Don't ever let me helicopter again.
Hi I am on my way. I stopped and got the cheeseburger you asked for. Are you gonna pay me back?
Who is this?
Randomize
