thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
Ugh, here's a dating tip. Hairy legs are a major turn off
Whenever I miss you I just turn on Tool Academy
Who was that guy you went home with?
Hang on, I'm trying to ask his name right now.
I was fucking the girl and her best friend walked in on us. She said we looked thirsty, got us a glass of water, and poured it down both of our throats. It was like... sex bottle service
She kept grabbing my head and told my faces to stop shaking.. Also, she kept whispering something about seeing flowers in my eyes.
The international association of gay square dance clubs had a booth set up in the lobby of my hotel.
I genuinely attribute some of my blowjob skills to playing saxophone in highschool
He's such a neat freak that he started making the bed while I was still laying on it naked. He succeed in case you were wondering.
The kitchen also doubles as a screaming room after midnight as long as you have something to muffle the sound
Ah Christ I think I've reached the single life mentality 100%. I just inquired a photographer about a photo shoot with my dog.
the yoga instructor with the "dirt" and "roots" tattoos is seriously mother nature. i get my period after ever session i have with her. i'm trippin' balls over it.
Social anxiety problems: I just had to get up and change stalls mid-poop because someone sat down in the one next to mine.
I’ve jerked off three times and taken five shits already today. Being hung over in your 40’s is a fucking roller coaster.
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