Still at the library. i hate tax accounting so much that i've started calling it potions...
i dont even know how to be here
What I wanna know is who took a picture eiffel towering her?
Great News, you CAN smoke bowls with a magnifying glass
I added "don't hook up with boys with girlfriends" to my new years resolution and realized how sad it was that it made me actually feel like a better person
He took me to the bathroom in the gay bar to "just cuddle." Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice...well...
I don't know what you're talking about but its dick galore in the tub. We will be getting poked tonight. Bring forks.
Apparently I walked up to him, mumbled something incoherently, then started to make out with him. Why does this always happen.
Also, I found out tonight a major plus for being female is you can accidentally call the hot bartender sweet tits and she won't get mad.
Well we were going to compare notes, but all I could remember was throwing up, and all she could remember was kissing, so then we decided to not compare anything.
I'm usually good at keeping a straight face, but not while singing a ballad to a stranger in a bathroom.
I'm not sure how to explain it, but I feel like our penises have a connection. Like long lost brothers. We're not even gay.
Like who needs a job and family when you can get drunk for free with strippers?
Goodnight Shia. Goodnight Moon.
Is there something wrong with us? Seriously.
Possibly, but I'd rather not fix it.
Randomize