is your mom at the bar?
If i could bang her from 80ft away, I would
I am so horny I keep driving over the rumble strips... best half hour ever.
just threw all of the fireworks into the bonfire. thats why there are firetrucks.
The voicemail says i shouldn't bother ever showing my face there again, i don't understand
We visited your boss last night. guess you wont be paying the rent this month, eh?
He had me believing he was actually British until he came and used his real voice.
they came at us with fireworks while we were skinny dipping in her jacuzzi at 4 am...
I need to cry about outer space to someone. Can I call you?
I considered my 2012 starting right when the cop followed the wrong car for the bottle rocket we shot at him
Lol. Awesome. Seriously though, I need you focused next year. We're gone have a lot of drinking and stupid nonsense to do, and I don't want dumb shit like responsibility to get in my fucking way.
I'd say things got weird when I started doing lines of molly in the box.
The family next to you was not pleased
Dad just asked me to breathalyze grandma
VOOOODKA VOOODKA WE PLEDGE OUR LOVE TO THEEEE VODKAAAA VODKAAAA SAVIOR OF LIBERTYYYY
I'm so hungover I just peed on my hand and left it, didn't wash... Killin it in 2915
I think I pulled a muscle in my tongue.
sorry? thank you? I love you?
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