I feel like our house is getting pulled over.
Does my status still say I suck cocks? I don't know how to change it
You pulled the fire alarm because you had to shit and there was someone in the bathroom. you said you needed privacy
Abby. I can text perfectly. I pledge allegiance to the flag of the united states of america. and to the republic, for which we stand, one nation under god indivisible and with liberty and justice for all god bless america
There are paw prints all over my ceiling.
I just wanna lay in my bed all bundled up as have someone feed me lettuce
told our landlord the hole in the wall was from your head during drunk sex..
how did he take it?
not as well as i would have thought
Her Grandmother felt me up AND paid for dinner. If she doesn't get her shit together I'm gonna be her Step Grandfather.
MANGO MOTHERFUCKING GODDAMN MARGARITA DELICIOUSNESS
HEY. That drawer full of booze in my dorm room also has aspirin and Tums in it. So don't tell me I don't care about health.
The next time you fuck up, your grandma sees your dick pics
I think id rather titty fuck an A cup than deal with what happened tonight again. shits depressing
I'll call it a tollerance break and either will be celebrating my new job with a bowl or will be smoking my sadness away from not getting the job. Either way.
I may have just tried to argue quantum entanglement as the reason I was still in her bed.
Blunts beyotch
What? Joints? Blunts?
I'll refer you to my previous text: "Blunts beyotch"
Randomize
