i'm sure her mom would have loved to find out her daughter has herpes via facebook
Why do bread and butter chips remind me of eating out your mom?
Don't leave without me in the morning. I keep scaring everyone cause I'm sleeping in the bathtub.
The world would have a new energy source if someone would just take a blacklight to the backseat of that slut's car
I feel like vodka or no vodka, you'd still be trying to button your cat into your comforter
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
afterward, he apologized, hugged me, and then gave me a granola bar and said “this is my apology gift.”
Ong my arms are moving wo my consent
All I know is I was dancing to Shakira in his alley and I think rubbing my junk on his car door.
wait no I wore my bra home that morning. I stole someone's bra last night?
Nope not happening. When I close my eyes the floor moves. I'm going to enjoy this free roller coaster.
Heat not working dressed like an eskimo. A real one with a ski sock on my junk
So this is what bad decisions tastes like...
If you think I'm going to drive 5.5 hours just to bang a guy, you'd be absolutely right.
His sex game is strong it’s like a warlord’s dick! you know what I mean?
Nope
Randomize
