you might get a letter about the baby you put in me. i was mad when i sent it.
so we were having anal, both very very drunk when he started shouting his roomates name
i wish there was a 'silent except for booty calls' volume level on my phone
Found my puke from September encrusted to the floor under the dresser while cleaning before move out ..... Oh Freshman year
I gave ten strangers a full description of his penis and its abilities. I need to stop drinking.
the bouncer watched the girl drop her ID, saw me pick it up and say OMG SHE LOOKS LIKE ME, and then let me use it to get into the bar
How soon is too soon to enter the slutty phase of this breakup?
Withdrawals are gods way of saying "you're still my bitch"
People dont know what to do when a naked fat guy is running towards them. they panic
I guess "Ass Fun Friday" is not a thing no matter how many times I say it or bring it up in conversation...
Uhh I just had to break up with a guy who I didn't even know I was dating...
Well I'm sorry I assumed you were a human and that humans have the capability to forget sometimes.
Wish me luck on my new penis adventure
so i went to the bathroom and my thong was on sideways... i guess that solves the mystery
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
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