So the D.A.R.E. essay I helped my tutor kid write won an award. Oh the irony.
my ass just sighed. even my farts are tired.
google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
Dude, you just left me a 3 minute voicemail of pop rocks in your mouth. Im sitting right next you
I just remember getting him back by licking the window on his truck.
normally i would apologize for my drunk texting but even sober me agrees.
Desperately trying not to throw up over the side of the ferry back to CT. Can't be the first one of the season.
happy find a boyfriend by next Valentines Day. Its like a new years resolution but depressing
Today needs to die. The mail delivery guy watched me throw up in my yard while taking my chihuahua out in Christmas pajamas at noon. Low point in my life.
We're only going to be this young and this cute but for so long. And how often is it that a pack of Albanian law students is in your house?!
At this point, if I'm not getting fucked by a man in ONLY cowboy boots, it's not worth it.
New low reached: a cockroach has actually drowned itself in our dirty dishes. We are heathens. Cleaning dance party tonight. No excuses.
Do you know how many guys' fantasies I've been told I'm a part of lately?!
Just 2. But still.
must go to store soon wiping with panty liner ugh
I don't get it. If he broke into Taco Bell at 2 am, then why couldn't he have brought me home a fucking taco???
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