Rescue me. My white trash great uncle just pulled out his belly at the restaurant to show us how big this woman's tit was
the cashier at riteaid just made the sign of the cross before he rang up my pregnancy test. now i know god is on my side
life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
I just delivered a ham and cheese to a strip club. you were right this job is not that bad
is it still called a breakup if its your friends boyfriend that you have stopped sleeping with?
I'm literally partying with O.J. Simpson's son right now. I don't know what to make of this.
Hurry there's a dancing lesbian. She's a jumper and has impeccable jazz hands.
I've blown him so many times I feel like I have a better relationship with his dick than I do with him.
hey i found one of your nipple clamps under my couch, i miss you!
We are there now. They have a giant cock and balls with an eagles face and wings.
i feel like i should invite him over so he can cockblock my roommate one last time before he graduates. for old times sake, ya know
Goddamnit Shari. He's not called Pencil Dick because he's good a sketching...
Let's take a shot for every time we've said "I don't want to get that drunk tonight"
I have a bottle of rum in my pocket...what does that say about me...
You come prepared
So I realize somewhere between mildly irritated and outright belligerently pissed is where you are, but as to location, where are you?
Randomize
