I met a girl last nite that charged by the inch. i didnt have enough money but i figured shed be a good deal for u
Yeah, getting the HI-fiVe would really put a damper on my whoring around.
last night i got mauled by 2 gay men who were trying to make each other jealous by making the other think they could swing back- you're going to love atl
i saw like six of her guido cousins in the jersey shore trailer alone. her family is having a dinner party for the premiere tonight.
He had a stripper pole in his bedroom. I didn't know whether to be impressed or creeped out.
He tried to say the picture wasn't him. Like I'd forget his curved boner.
I'll be honest with you, my dick was out at that point in time.
People said that when they tried to talk to me I answered that there was a glass around my head stopping me from answering them
Just used "I used to work as an inflatable toy operator" as a pick up line. Freshman frenzy is great...
She was so morning drunk she asked the lady at brueggers for a bandaid and my self respect back
hey sorry if you felt me holding your hand in the middle of the night I was actually just checking if you had a pulse
This bitch rocks a fuckin fanny pack and still manages to lose her phone at every thirsty thursday
I've noticed we have slowly begun to phase the "B" out of our Bromance.
When I say "is it a bad idea to do Mollie before an 8hr shift tomorrow?" I dont want to hear the truth I want to hear you encouraging my bad decisions
dude i told her that I loved her...and she said, " go fuck yourself"
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