I can't sleep so instead I'm thinking of all the things I would love to do to you right now
That's weird, I usually just count sheep
I got three cases. When they asked for id I said it was suspended for drunk driving.
she texted him the burrito order while she was puking in the Del Taco parking lot...
Say it nicely.
Fine. I want to lovingly bend you over and lovingly fuck the shit out of you. Happy?
he made me scream out "#24" while we fucked...no more football players
It's safe to say that our attempt at trying to fuck in the grand Sierra elevator was a bad idea.
I walked out of the bedroom naked holding a used condom only to be greeted by half of my family. Happy birthday mom
Just saw an all male dolphin threesome from underwater viewing
I found your dog. Now we are bros, so he is staying. Don't call, don't make it weird.
the reputation of my dick game is on the line. You're killing the team, here, G
He just snapchatted me a blank snap that said "miss our sex" Vagina game too strong
Remember that guy that walked around our house naked with a boner wearing nothing but his winter coat? Well, he has a kid now.
He’s really fucking cute. Like, I want his penis in my mouth cute.
I'm covered in bruises and scratches. I dont know whether to call them battlescars or sex decals
I know you’re not my dad, but you’re someone’s dad. You’re also like a second dad to me as well. And one who I send nudes to as well. Happy Father’s Day
Randomize
