I seem to have left my pride at pride
I dont remember anything after Tequila & Apple Juice. May have disovered the recipe for mental bleach.
I realized today that I should stop thinking so much with my vagina instead of my brain.
Please tell me this doesn't mean another "surprise road trip" where I spend all my money on gas and the SURPRISE destination is the abortion clinic.
But what if I pay for the gas?
Anyway, my grandfather thinks you're attractive
an unopened bag of salt and vinegar chips... probably the best thing I've ever found in my room while high.
He's spent his last 3 years working at Urban Outfitters. No, I'm not sad I missed out on a life of mustaches, the dollar menu and shitty scarves.
REAL PEOPLE DRINK 3 BEERS ALONE WILL WATCHING THE LIFETIME MOVIE ABOUT PRINCE WILLIAM AND KATE MIDDLETON
Waking and baking in my bathtub. In a giant sweater. And no pants. This is going to be the best 420 ever.
I dunno. Last time I went there I had got sexually propositioned by a Belgian prince.
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
we were both freshly single and using each other as rebounds. most intense sex I've ever had. i felt like a grizzly bear emerging from hibernation in a whirlwind of sexual fury
I woke up at 5am to tell him I wanted to take his dick on la Tour de France, I might need a nap later
I feel like I should be having more sex dreams of my boyfriend than his sister..
No biggie, just trying to keep my liver function in the green
My Easter Basket from my parents consisted of one chocolate bunny and a massive amount of condoms and a single note saying "the pope approves of the use of condoms" love mom and dad
Randomize
