What are you drinking?
Shitty Coors light. OM NOM NOM TASTES LIKE HIGH SCHOOL
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
Prostitute standing on the corner thrusting at cars as they drive by. New marketing strategy?
i just woke up to seventeen texts from you saying all the things you would have done for a french fry.
what date should I let him know how fucked up I am?
Got a stripper to howl at my wolf shirt.
At one point in time, he cried and said I didn't appreciate him.
Also txt me when you take your first dump of the year... I'd like to synchronize if that's at all possible.
Just got that "I know what's going on with your vagina" look from that CVS cashier.
You bought MORE?!
According to you, you were with your "Eskimo bro for life" last night.
Do you think the police would frown on me opening a psych drug pharmacy on the side? Just to dispose of my drugs without polluting the water supply! It is for the animals!
Bourbon is too strong for my cat, he does not want to drink it
It's so weird fucking this kids aunt then going to the gym with him everyday, but my sick minded self loves it.
i just swapped my iPhone for a happy meal. this is greg btw, the hooker let me borrow her phone
The dog peed on the neighbors baby Jesus. No wonder she thinks we're the devil.
Randomize
