I did the walk of shame to another booty call
I don't think that should turn me on, but it does
I could write a book called "things that come out of my vagina"
were with a gay guy with a minnesota accent. think about how funny that sounds.
im in an endless cycle of being too hung over to eat all day...then getting too drunk because i didnt eat anything. where is my life going?
nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
so she called me drunk and made me stay on the phone with her while she puked.
The worst part is I think my tongue cut his penis and now he wont talk to me.
Just learned how to deliver a baby.the things i saw tonight can never be unseen
i leave for school in 3 days. if you want your annual goodbye blow job you should probably call me
All i know if I'm throwing uo into a bag with a smiley facE on it right now and this is not a smileuy face time right nowe
What was she thinking? I'm not in the business of charity fucks anymore.
My feelings are currently in a sea of vodka and "I don't give a shit"
Aren't they always?
i'm not even sure i have knees anymore. that awesome.
Just scratched my head and I basically rained glitter.
Went on a blind date. Afterwards I ripped my pants off and said "it's game time". He was into it.
Randomize
