Nicole vs. Life
So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
Needless to say, wine tasting turned into wine chugging
so i walked in, looked up the stairs and all i saw was smashed pumpkin, tube socks, and marinara sauce
Houston, we have a problem
where are u?
Houston. That's the problem. I don't know how I got here.
im pretty sure this vending machine only exists when im drunk
He said he has something to give me... I swear to God if it's a joint or a framed picture of his penis i'm going to kill him
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
I've got my wine, though it wasnt very good so I threw a sour patch kid in it
the lesbians just got naked and went into the ocean... this never happened when i was a camper.
he's definitely still old enough to be your dad. even your grandfather, if you come from a line of juvenile delinquents
I feel like as your wife, as cool with your decision-making skills as I usually am, there should be a bigger explanation to you adopting a child while I'm in Houston.
Wow I got tittyfucked by the American Dream
I'm never going out with the ashleys again. it was whoreible. terrifyingly whoreible.
So why are your hands bright blue and have you seen my roommate.
Both questions will answer each other.
Randomize
