I'm at the bar with Ashley what should I do?
humiliate her
Nope, didn't see her. We left when you told us you were going to make the " big beef burrito supreme" even more supreme and you took your dick out.
My booty call got married. Come over before I start tagging all the places my dick has been in her wedding photos.
That's saying a lot from the girl who takes her liquor with her to the library
hey did i steal that bike before or after the ball dropped, casue i might have broken my resolution already
He won't ever take me seriously if I keep getting drunk and hooking up with all his friends.
It all boils down to, who else do we know that is willing to buy our friendship?
I feel like I just tasted lung cancer.
My name in their phones is "That Girl". If i can't get it to go away, I might as well live up to it.
all i could think about while he was eating me out was how pretty his eyelashes were
Just me. You're probably having sex with her right now, so here's a reminder that you should be thinking of me per our agreement.
I was just too high to be in rapids man. I just screamed for the entire time I was jostling about.
the last time I drank tequila I ended up riding your skateboard nude down the street... so yeah, I'll have a few shots.
Tell me why i'm looking through my medical records and the last thing it said about my labor was 'vagina was explored'!?
I gave him a hand job in the parking lot... now he thinks we're meant for each other...
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