I'm trying to bond with my sister... Its like getting to know a person I never met that I don't like
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
If I say "It's good enough" and I'm not talking about a sandwhich, that's your queue to stop me, you're supposed to be my friend.
I'm wearing this super skanky ass dress that's wayyy to slutty for church but I think Jesus will appreciate it because i look so bangin for his bday.
Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
Just bought two budlight beers with a can of tuna at the bar
Except there is my pee all over the walls now
I don't know what's worse the the fact he has worn a protective cup for last 3 years in fear of being kicked in the balls. Or the fact that the one day he decides to throw caution to the wind and doesn't wear it and actually gets kicked in the balls.
Who in tha hell do u hang out with?
I'll answer your question with a question: Are you gonna be too high?
He said I act like a cross between a kindergartener and a high 70 year old man. Which is inacurate because it fails to account for the disco obsession.
We're going as conductors of the hot mess train and nobody rides for free
Our tip jar will say "just put the tip in, see how it feels"
If the sex wasn't incredible why would I compare it to cheesy tots
I just had to close my blinds so my neighbors wouldn't see me drinking a beer at 9 am. GO CHIEFS!
I don't know what she looks like but I'm pretty sure she has a pussy.
Bro, she said she wanteo to fuck me with my white Nike cap on so I resemble a douchebag. I think my choice of women might be coming into question
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