I asked her if she watches the office. She said no, but do you watch I'm a celebrity get me outa here? That's when i knew. Deal breaker
Then he told me he was 40. I'm not sure if I have enough Daddy issues to go for it
we went through the mcdonalds drive through and you asked for a free sample of their fries to see how you liked them.
They'd unbutton the overalls with their lesbian-tongues. It wouldn't even be a problem.
I know I should be focused on nurturing their bright little minds but it's 10 a.m. and I need a cock in my mouth
I just found a plastic cup with panties inside of it. Let's play CSI.
I apologize for violently hooking up with her in front of you in the jacuzzi last night.
Just did it in a room with glowing stars to Peter Gabriel's down to earth on shrooms. This is like god
captain cockblock got me again last night so i put a squirrel in his room and jamed the door shut
You were taking in your sleep. You were like Jess that's that animal we were talking about and you Hugged her feet
Well then she has to know whoever you were kissing was in overalls because that's not a detail you just leave out.
Beyoncé wouldn't let anything bad happen here
So her ex boyfriend came up a lot in conversation while I was fucking her. Is that weird?
Who the fuck has a conversation during sex?
My brain is a dvd screensaver and I'm allowed to have a good thought when it hits the corner
I am way to hungover for it to be Thursday.
Randomize