Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
I'm constantly one strobe light away from an E flashback
bio was interesting today. swabbed my mouth to see what the cells where, ha. found a sperm cell. he was just that awesome
i just ran into our bio chem professor at the bar. apparently, he doesn't follow the "no slapping your students' asses" rule.
Leave it to him to get us kicked out of a bar for hitting on an 80 year old woman. I want to be that wasted one day.
His threats seemed pretty legit for a 6 year old
You do realize that you tried to eat the neighbors cat because the dominos guy was 5 minutes late. You would have succeeded if we didnt stop you.
stef broke her leg trying to vault over the coffee table. these olympics drinking games are going to fucking kill us
When he wears his hair down and sandals, he looks like Jesus. A Jesus I would fuck.
That's not what Jesus is for
My mom is currently out with her lesbian friends and I'm home alone drunk listening to the Les Miserables soundtrack. WHY DO I FEEL THE NEED TO COMPETE WITH HER?
So what you're saying is that The Magic Kingdom is ruining our plans to get laid?
I can't believe you cupped pat's balls to prove your fake relationship
Sooooooo this guy just asked me if I'd be interested in a threesome... I'm considering bc I would get to hang out with his dog afterwards.
I should probably eat a Plan B. Pill for breakfast. Happy Halloween.
I woke up to find I still had sequins under my tits. I'd say Sunday was a success.
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