You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
He’s a liberal pot smoker and perfect for me. He invented a game where we have to smoke a joint every time you hear a Middle Eastern accent on NPR.
You stayed up for three hours wasted, feeding my rabbit 2 1/2 boxes of girl scout cookies.
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
Pretty sure I can show you the text you sent me stating some interest in my penis entering your mouth if said circumstances were met.
About to trim my pubes so if you decide to walk in, viewer discretion is advised.
I could study for finals and ace all my tests but wheres the fun in that? id rather black out and hope for the best
I am an advanced cybernetic robot sent back in time to 2013 to fuck my wife senseless for hours on end. Have you seen this wife?
Eddy, if you don't want to roll play then say so. This is just obnoxious
I've somehow found myself in an emotionally abusive relationship with a married man who gives me drugs.
My life is quickly turning into a Lifetime movie.
I blacked out at work again... Except this time my boss watched me throw up by the bus stop and some woman let me sleep on her shoulder for an hour. Why does this keep happening?
I remember sitting in your lap naked saying I don't want to be all looks while you gently rocked me back and forth
Captain and coke. And it's not drinking alone cuz i have a dog
All I remember about last st pattys day was I was in a bathtub with full bubbles, fully clothed, drinking out of a flamingo lawn ornament that someone cut a hole in.
I just said "I love my cat" as a hobby.
I am high playing guitar hero naked. Please don't let me die this way
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