We got so high yesterday we tried watching soccer
She threw up everywhere and is crying about a fictional character who died on Grey's Anatomy
Who would have thought the night we were surrounded by 4 cops would be the most responsible night of the week.
would it be subtle enough if I played birthday sex on repeat while I may or may not be stripping?
Omg I'm so stupid. All the peoples fb status that said "spain" I thought they were all going to spain.......
I feel like I'm sitting in a sleigh of puddy. It's not a bathtub though because you need a sleigh to go down a mountain.
I may be Daddy's little princess, but doesn't mean I can't be the blowjob queen.
using the campers leftover pizza money at the bar. Definition of great counselors right here.
Also, that dude projectile vomiting all over the living room was the perfect distraction for me to swipe the booze and run.
well shes beginning to earn a reputation as "the girl who tries to bone her hook ups in the ass with a pickle"
She makes him look at her naked pics before she sends them to someone she's actually going to fuck. I think this makes him mayor of the friend zone.
Sure. But we have to be quiet.
Ninja mode activated
You know it's a bad cold when sneezing feels better than orgasming...
That song just makes me wanna take off my top and shake my titties all around the club.
in fetal position in his closet not sure if he knows im here... hugging his spongebob cake pan i stole.... now please come find me..
Randomize
