haha i took a picture of myself naked on her camera
She didnt have a camera...
It is virtually impossible to listen to single ladies and perform any seated task.
Outta milk. Using rum instead for pancake mix. Drunk Thursday is a gooo
At beerfest, hammered, going to try to not get naked in public but i cant make any promises
he's drinking beer at home in his underwear tonight and if you want to come over the dresscode is underwear only. And you have to bring beer.
I had to find out that I peed in the box of baby clothes from my mom, who found out from my grandma. New low.
You know this who 'I show my love by being a total dick' thing is getting old, right?
I woke up naked on his boat with a cowboy hat on with a boat cover over me... Thank you tequila!
Not remembering where I left my grinder before vacation #stonerproblems
I puked on his mom. Not my proudest moment
Saw my drug dealer at Easter mass with his family so that was weird
It's 4/20 and I spent the morning in the gym and am working later tonight. I don't even have any weed. Why am I adult-ing again?
Dude I had sex with her and she STILL thinks I'm gay. I don't know what else to do.
I woke up next to my bosses toilet.i wish you had just left me in the neighbors yard.
Do you think the hole in the ceiling will count against our security deposit?
Randomize
