There is no way to make a throwing up smiley so just picture it....
so high. i feel like my whole body is a boner
I'm still reeling over the fact that you beat us all at Risk while you were flat on your ass drunk and falling asleep on South America.
I started the year with 2,800 dollars and am now down to 83 dollars-one of which i use to snort my focalin. I have given up on food and am perplexed as to how I can make 82 dollars last more than two weekends for booze
you're acting like its my fault you're allergic to sperm or something.
i told you we never speak of that again
using smirnoff bottles as a pillow actually isnt as uncomfortable as you would think
What's standard gratutity for someone having a miscarriage on stage at a strip club? It's important.
I feel like jumping into a breast pit right now. Like the old school ball pits at mcdonalds.
So was I the only one that was competing in the whale hunt?
dude you literally had like 30 screwdrivers, i thought you were gonna die
that explains why my vomit smells like it came from florida
Hungover, threw up in a cosmetic case in my car this morning. This is real life.
I mean I faked it but he could answer my texts
I can't control his boners. I can only encourage them.
He put his SoundCloud on his Tinder bio. I felt personally attacked.
You're even getting laid in my dreams, god I'm a good wingman
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