Dude i just saw JT leaving the hospital. He drove there to get fluids because he was too drunk, so they hooked him up to an IV so he didn't get alcohol poisoning. Did I mention he drove there? Oh yea and our roommates in the hospital with alcohol poisoning, she just puked up coal. So many ppl are here, it's like a hospital party, I love spring quarter!
do herpes really smell.
i feel like my eyelids need a kick stand.
i was on the fence about his sexual orientation until he referred to his marlboro loghts as "carrie bradshaws"
we went to get a refill in his room and ended up having sex and passing out. then he woke me up with sex and gave me a beer for breakfast. i never want this to end
I walked in and she was kneeling on the ground with no pants on, throwing up, and holding the puppy. It was one of those moments, where i was like damn i wish i had my camera.
Just to warn you I probably wont be able to do anything that involves standing up
I fell asleep in my underwear on the deck. What the fuck.
This was the best text I've ever woken up to
Do you think it's wrong for me to hop on that dick before he realizes that he's gay?
It all started with sending him a text about Spongebob. It escalated from there.
No no this isn't that fun. I'm alone drinking wine and me and the dogs ran out of things to talk about around 9 am.
I'm not trying to take your husband away from you, but can we have another 3way soon? I'm just desperate for good dick.
There comes a point where there's just condoms and old mcdonalds in your garbage can and you can't tell if you've won or lost.
tell me about the eggs
Tinder has really served to stimulate the number of sex related demons summonings.
Randomize
