He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
just apologized to a random stranger while waiting in line for coffee. last night was that drunk
they started a semi-successful rumor that toby keith died. who says fraternities don't have goals
Dubbing lion king over planet earth. That stoned.
There is a visibable outline from you in the grass. its you in the fetal position...
If I don't at least start a parade that spirals into drunken riots then I'm calling it a fail of a birthday
Yea I saw a friend of yours carrying your limp body somewhere
I GOOGLED IT. BEES CAN MASTURBATE. WHAT.
We ended up at a lesbian bar and all my co-workers tried to get me laid. This is not how I envisioned coming out.
I kinda took a step back after our "surprise bottles night"
No one parties "Full Karen". She once broke a couple up at the bar, ate the girl out in the bathroom and took the guy home.
I just had some kinky fun in the back seat of my car behind a Ralph's in south county. How's your thanksgiving eve?
Also, I don't know if it's the drugs I'm on or not, but I truly believe I was hypnotized last night listening to an audio book.
Okay Im still jerking off but now with the Reality of Law School Looming In The Distance
The fact that you got a stranger guy to buy you a pizza off tinder makes me feel amazing
Randomize
