i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
Between the two of us weve fucked every guy at this table
Tis a story best told in person, it involves a golf course, police and vomit
It usually does with you
Her directions to the house party: "the north star will guide you, turn left. I'm wearing the potato hat"
he gets drunk and then tries to eat the lasers at the dance club
Maybe. This hangover is made of nightmares and that thing from the Alien movies.
Today, my boyfriend informed me that I look like my dad when I orgasm
Both our collective sex appeal dies once someone cums on a snuggie kayla
In the wise words of Scar: "be prepared."
Do you think Scar was a Boy Scout?
Will you trust fall hold me, so I can pee of this building.
I'm on my way back with the wine... And a puppy. It was free.
just imagine me sitting naked on a toilet with a fully-clothed dude i havent seen in 2 years, trying to make normal conversation except that im covered in blood and he's helping wipe me down while i try not to pass out because blood makes me NERVOUS. And he's apologizing and i'm apologizing.
You can't do wine Netflix and blow jobs in the bed you've had since 5th grade with your parents downstairs
He listens to me complain and in return I send him naked pictures. It's a win win situation
He showed up in a Prius. I didn’t even wanna.... So I left.
Randomize
