For some reason, Oliver from Hannah Montana reminds me of pudding.
That's cute.
something must definitely be wrong with me if i'm chasing after a guy who cant even get it up
no.. I went home. Puking up hot dogs and lemon tart isn't as lovely as it sounds.
FOR A FUCKING 40?! A FUCKING 40?! YOU GAVE THE CAT AWAY FOR BEER?!
I had fun last night. We should have sex less often.
I was doing the dishes wondering what was with all the tiny little cups, but then I remembered that some people drink things other than huge mixed drinks and big cups of water the next day.
Too bad my thesis topic isn't "defining a hot mess: a study in drinking, smoking and other bad life decisions."
We decided that the paper cups disintegrating was god's way of telling us we had had enough
I really want to lead this Amish guy into temptation
I picked up a chick last night on crutches wearing a I am boobman tshirt. I love raves.
It took years to build this empire of casual fuckings and not carings.
He told me to take off work and bring a bathing suit. If this doesn't involve six flags hurricane harbor or sex in a hotel pool I'm going to be disappointed.
I think he has some internal "man stuff" that keeps getting in the way.
Like alcoholism and general douchbagary.
I should stop pointing to my vagina when I say "I'm in charge!"
My brothers dog was hit by a car and died. They're really sad about it.
But they're having a baby! It's like a dog only 40 billion times worse!
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