So drunk, too bad you don't want this
I just put out an orange level terrorist threat on her punani
I just showed my boobs to our astate representative hahahahahahha
We got blackout for the alumni dinner, and then walked THROUGH the keynote speaker, managing to still say "excuse me".
And then I interrupted the father of the groom, to ask if she was "ballet or pole" in the middle of his story about his niece, the dancer.
From the prices on this menu it looks like I have no choice. I have to blow him.
threw up on my 7.30 AM placement test. Never again
Your niece just basically announced she's a whore on FB so you should feel pretty good about officiating that wedding next month.
I went up by the border of Canada. We took shrooms and went fishing...pretty sure we killed a dragon and ate it for dinner
Right now, I'm sitting in my room, drinking beer, eating double stuff Oreos, taking bites straight from a block of cheese, and watching Anchor Man 2 trailers. Finals week at its finest
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
You told us that you were going to become a 'new man' and threw your tv set out of a window.
Yeah. I hurt his pride. But he's not over it. And by it I mean me.
That bitch claimed that you said it was ok if she drank your vodka. Obviously she has never met you
Spotify says I’m in the top 1% of Indigo Girls fans worldwide. Didn’t know I would peak this early.
Aren’t you trying to seem...less lesbian?
Randomize
