meet me in the bathroom in 10 mins.
wait what? who are you hooking up with in the bathroom?!
aww shit wrong text.
You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
He cooked the food on a paper plate in the oven.
Just found the book "How to Stay Christian in College" on my roommates desk. At a loss for words...
Having him eat chocolate out of you is not as romantic as it sounds. I'm still finding pieces.
new plan: i think the keg will fit in my purse.
I walked into my room to see them crying, watching hey arnold, and passing a franzia box back and forth...
you think that next time i come over to do this you can pick up the condom wrappers you used on the other girls
ughh I puked about 4 times on metro, no one seems to like the cool design I made on my shirt
you should be careful. everyone knows your chances of pregnancy increase by 100 percent when youre the daughter of a religious figure
You can't possibly imagine how much I miss you. At least I'll always have that hidden folder in my computer.
It's not even 6 am and I've already told my mom to fuck herself in the face
Evidently I placed three booty calls at the same time...it was an ugly scene. I'm never getting that high again.
I'm gonna go parent style on your ass... I don't ask much from you but if you could please just come get shitfaced with me I would really appreciate it
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