Yeah...you.wanna.hang.out.tomorrow?My.space.button.is.broken.
Hey baby girl when you gonna let my tongue get up in that ass like i'm an explorer trying to go deep under on a quest for the lost city of atlantis
your text was fucking rediculious. Will let you eat my asshole though.
If you don't sleep with him after showing him your thong with the bow, I am no longer on your side.
I hope no one judges me for becoming a facebook fan of "Adderall" at 5:49 AM...
Your ability to be a slut in your nightmare astounds me
I just smoked my last bit of kief with a grill lighter. This is what crackheads must feel like.
Either this is the best sandwich I've ever had, or my stomach is just relieved to have something in it that's not Red Bull or semen.
They let me keep the giant cocktail glass because I threw up in it. And made out with the bartender. Europeans are so generous. I'm getting it engraved
I'm not sure what happened last night but I woke up next to him and I was wearing nothing but my grandpa's diabetic socks, so I'm letting that fill in the blanks.
Thanks i'm proud of you and I'm proud of beer and vodka for making me drunk
How many Wendy's frosties do you think it would take to fill a bathtub?
i need some fresh meat. meat that has a license and a job and isn’t a FULL-blown alcoholic. partial i could tolerate, bc, haha, let’s be honest, me likey my drinkies.
THEY HAVE BEEN GOING AT IT FOR 2 HOURS AND I HEAR THEM BANGING THIS IS BULLSHIT
I love her so much I can forgive her for wearing crocs
How was it?
Incredible. Everyone in the world should be having the kind of sex I've been having.
He should write a pamphlet or something...
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