I reminded them that I didn't puke and I cleaned yours up! So huh!
So we've decided on 'hamburger' as your code for tonight. If you add ketchup or fries, we know the threat level has escalated.
I just heard a girl in all seriousness say, "I told him I'm not a stalker. I just really really want to talk to him."
I'm watching Intervention to get pumped up for tonight
my secret santa just gave me a pregency test
They are providing beer and having a margarita machine. This cannot be passed up.
I woke on the floor next to a big TV. Apparently I traded my bed for a 52 inch samsung and a box of pop tarts.
At what point should i just give my brother a break and stop sleeping with his friends?
All three roommates are gay and in women's studies. Ive already been informed that all penetration is rape. This is not the college experience I signed up for.
YET AGAIN, my financial planning for 2013 consists MOSTLY of eating chipotle as "brain food" and drinking Heavily before the Jeopardy contestant test.
His grandma held his dogs so they wouldn't follow me out the door. It was like a whole new level added to my walk of shame.
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
There is a man in my bed with "new zealand" tattooed on his back. Wtf happened last night?
I just used a bag of jelly beans as an arm weight...I'm not sure what to think of myself
So she was amazing, that's what. Idk if it was the blow or the blowjob, but both my heads are still tingling.
Randomize
