it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
Waitress cut us off at Chili's bar. New low
You dont ever try to use your dick as a power washer to get bits of poop of the toilet bowl?
it's like your virginity...sometimes you have to pretend like it's still there
theres a difference between trying to make someone happy and letting them fuck you in the ass
Results of pregaming honors college basketball social: 18 points, 3 blocks, and 3 flagrant fouls leading to 2 broken bones on former valedictorians. I'm doing this more often.
If drinking before honors events and injuring our universities brightest doesn't get you kicked out of the program, you're not trying hard enough.
I drink more single than I do in relationships. Except with assface.
threw up outside of the dorms in the parking lot in the pouring rain on the first day of class, i'd say summer is off to a good start.
Bathtub drinking tim. I have no pool so I work with what I have
I was unconscious Saturday for like 6 hours after I passed out on the sidewalks of our nation's capital. Thank you America, for bottomless brunch.
I told people at my moms bar that all I needed to sober up was to get my asshole licked, and I blame you 110%.
I miss my teeeeeeeeth. They're in a bag in my hand.
You're having marijuana delivered to you. You're buying drugs and you aren't even leaving the house. I'm sure he'll be surprised if you're NOT wearing a bathrobe.
Car sex in a public place. Boo ya.
I'm too hungover to Google him and try to save face.
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