So remember when i bet you that girl uses dick to validate her existence?
...yea
She's valid.
all i know is that they all tuched my pee cup last night.
she came to the game with a camelback filled with booze. except it was only the bag part so she duct taped to her back
He said he got a lot of action last night. I asked how much? And he said he got to see down her shirt. Freshmen never cease to amaze me.
We just leapfrogged all the way to the bar.
Brandon's Recipe: two parts cocoa, one part sugar, one part milk, two parts four, 378 parts paranoia. Thanks for the fucking brownies, bitch.
I'm not saying you did or didn't sleep with him but he's has your thong hanging from his ceiling fan
The police report said "I asked the suspect if he had any identification. He replied yes and gave me a Pizza Hut gift card"
good news: smoking weed at school again, quality of life has improved drastically
I finally had to say "that's the hole where I pee" for him to understand.
I shotgunned a beer immediately puked and rallied. And by rallied I mean had sex in the bathroom after he held my hair.
What a gentleman.
Nothing says you made great Saturday night choices like someone's dick that you don't remember, poking you in the ass Sunday morning.
Got lost on the way to my dealer again. He stayed on the phone with me untill i found him and then hooked it up because I got lost.. What a genuine person.
We made out in front of everyone INCLUDING his girlfriend. And no one saw. THAT DRUNK!
Please tell me why we have been neighbors since elementary school and waited until the night before I moved to fuck.
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